dress up

it’s 5 a.m.

the bathroom light is on
mascara smudged everywhere
papers in a jumbled mess on the floor
leftovers on the nightstand
and a reflection in the mirror
it’s blurry
and dark

the reflection
grabs a makeup brush
paints its face
pulls a piece of fabric over its head
grabs a bag off of the floor
pauses
and looks in the mirror once more

it gets closer
its eyes
are tired
it looks distracted

it’s 6 a.m.

it opens the door
walks down the hall
with something in its hand
its glowing
there are pictures on it
faces
people
things
extravagant things

it’s a girl
holding a phone
she’s crying

it’s 7 a.m.

she’s at school
hiding her face behind a book
she’s alone

it’s 12 p.m.

she’s in the bathroom
huddled over a toilet
scrolling through pictures
on her camera roll

it’s 4 p.m.

she’s in her bedroom
sweating
watching workout videos
with a look of motivation on her face

it’s 6 p.m.

she doesn’t eat as much anymore
she’s pulling further and further away
she sees these people online
having the time of their lives
enjoying every fleeting second of every day

it’s 8 p.m.

she’s in bed
looking up at the ceiling and wondering when
when will she be like those people
those people on the movie screens
those people who always smile

it’s 11 p.m.

she’s sleeping
she’s dreaming of her perfect day
she’s dreaming of something bright
and beautiful

it’s 12 a.m.

what she doesn’t realize
is that things will get better
it won’t always be perfect
it won’t always be like those people she sees online
it won’t always be greener on the other side

but she’ll make it
somehow

it’s 5 a.m.

there’s a reflection in the mirror.

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